How It Has Been Going From One To Two Children

I’m going to be honest with you all and say that going from one to two children has been a little chaotic.

I’m sure that part of the reason it is a little chaotic is that we now have two children under the age of 3.

My oldest daughter will be 3 years old next month and my second baby girl just recently turned 3 months old, so yeah, we have really young children.

And both of our daughters are in different stages in life.

With my oldest being a toddler, she acts very independent and wants to do everything on her own but she still relies on me and needs my help.

And my youngest is a baby who is very dependent on me for all of her needs and cannot do anything for herself.

So you can probably see where the chaos might occur.

Having a toddler and a baby can be a lot to handle, so it has taken a little time to adjust to going from one to two children.

We knew that we wanted children close in age because we knew that it would be much easier for them to bond as they got older versus having a large age gap.

But we have to get through the early stages and that is currently what we are in the thick of here in our household.

There have been a few things that I have been doing to stay sane during this transition from one child to two and I want to share those tips here.

Here is how it has been going from one to two children.

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Is It Harder Going From 0-1 or 1-2 Kids?

Before I get into how we have been adjusting going from one to two kids, let me answer this question from my point of view.

Is it harder to go from 0-1 or 1-2?

You might all be surprised to hear this, but it is 0-1 for me.

Now I know what you all are thinking.

“But Jas, didn’t you just say how chaotic it has been going from one to two? And now you are saying that going from having no kids to one kid was even tougher?”

Why yes I am and let me explain why.

When you go from being just being an individual to becoming a mom for the first time, your whole life changes.

And like most women who become first-time moms, I just was not prepared for all of that comes with it mentally and emotionally.

If you all have read about me, then you would know that I got pregnant shortly before graduating with my Master’s Degree in Family Therapy and then I became a stay-at-home mom with my daughter.

I did not plan on being a stay-at-home mom, but that is worked for our family at the time and still continues to work for our family to this day.

Becoming a mom affected me a lot emotionally and I even dealt with postpartum depression for the majority of my daughter’s first year.

So to go from going from having no kids to having one did a number on me.

But it never stopped me from wanting a second child and I absolutely do not regret having a second child.

Things may be a little chaotic, but I’m in such a better place mentally to be able to handle it.

I have embraced the chaos and loved what our second baby girl brings to our family.

Now that I have answered that question, let’s get into some tips on what it is like going from one to two children.

How It Has Been Going From One To Two Children

The way I’m going to discuss how it has been going from one to two children is by providing you all tips for this transition while also talking about how it has been going for the past 3 months.

“You’ve done this before but you also… haven’t”

So my first tip is from The Every Mom and it is this quote “you have done this before but you also…..haven’t.”

I love that the writers mention this because it is so true.

We have done this before since we already have one child, but we have never had two so this will be a different experience.

Plus each child is different so what might have worked with your first when they were a baby may not work with this new baby.

This leads me to my next tip.

Each Child Is Different

As I was saying above, each child is different so you have to be flexible to each of your child’s needs.

Obviously, your baby will be completely dependent on you so you have to pay attention to their needs but don’t be surprised if they do something different than what your first child did.

A prime example is my oldest daughter not really needing to be burped as much and hardly spit it so we could lay her down pretty much right after feeding her.

However, this baby is a lot gassier than my first daughter and needs to be held upright after feedings and burped in order to make sure her tummy is ok or she will start screaming when laid down.

She has only been with us for 3 months and this is only the first of the differences that we will likely encounter as she gets older.

Help Your First Child Adjust To The New Baby

Your first child was an only child before their sibling got here, so make sure you are helping them adjust to the new baby.

My daughter loves her baby sister and you will find her kissing and hugging her all of the time, but there are definitely moments where she wants to be treated like a “baby” as well.

Helping your first child adjust to their new sibling will require patience on your end, but it is necessary.

You can help your child adjust by involving them in helping with their new sibling.

Not only are you getting the help, but your children are already bonding with one another which is what we ultimately want as parents.

Find A Way To Be Present With Your First Child

While still on the subject of helping your first child adjust to their new sibling, you have to find a way to be present with your other child.

As a breastfeeding mom with a baby on my breast every 2-3 hours, the last thing I want to do sometimes is sit down and play with my other daughter.

Once we as the parents make the decision to add another child to our families, our attention will be divided.

Babies will naturally require more of our attention at first which is why we have to be intentional with our attention towards our first.

I try to take my daughter places where she can play and have fun a couple of times during the week and try to make sure I tuck her in and read a story to her every night before bed.

It’s the little things and I try to make sure that she still feels loved and not forgotten.

One Thing At A Time

When you have two children, you will feel like you are doing twice the work.

And to be honest you are because you are juggling multiple children.

But if we try to do too many things at once, we are bound to make some mistakes and miss something.

For me, it can be my toddler whining and telling me that she is hungry while my baby girl is crying because she pooped on herself.

I have to take it one task at a time or I will forget to tend to someone.

I prioritize tasks and figure out which tasks can wait and which tasks need to be handled at that very moment.

If my baby has pooped, I obviously don’t want her sitting in poop so I will change her first and then I will make my daughter something to eat.

Babywearing

If there is one item I can recommend when you become a second-time mom, it is a baby wrap or carrier.

If you checked out my post on all of my newborn essentials for my second child, then you will have noticed that I noted this item there as well.

Babywearing is essential when you having young children.

Especially when you have 2 under 3 as I do.

Like I mentioned above, my toddler is very independent but she also still relies on me for a lot of her needs so I can still use my hands.

The baby wrap that I use and love is this Boba Wrap Baby Carrier.

Accept Help When You Can

And my last tip when you are going from one to two children is to accept the help when you can.

When I had my second baby, I was very grateful for the family that we had around us for those first couple of weeks to help with our first.

After everyone left, it was up to my husband and me to figure out things as a new family of 4, but if someone is available and wants to help you with the kids sometimes, then let them.

I am lucky to have a younger sister, who is also a mom, that lives about 25 minutes away so once a week, we will meet up and have a playdate with our kids.

She gets to see her nieces and I get to have adult time and a second pair of eyes on my little ones so it is a win-win for both of us.

Your Turn

Alright well that is has been going and all of my tips for going from one to two children. Yes, it is more chaotic than having just one child, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. I want to hear from you all now. What are your tips when transitioning from one child to two? Let me know in the comments below and while you are still here, check out my previous post. Until next time!

• Read More: Newborn Must-Haves For My Second Baby

Love,

Just Jass