Safe Ways To Bedshare With A Newborn

I know I didn’t know this at first but there are some safe ways to bedshare with a newborn.

I know I may receive some backlash on this post because there is a lot of experts who will say otherwise and that you should not bedshare with your baby.

But after doing it with my first daughter and now my second daughter, I feel a little more confident in speaking on this topic.

I never thought that I would be the mom who would be bedsharing with their babies, yet here I am.

In fact, I was terrified of bedsharing with my first baby.

The first few nights after I brought her home, I endured many sleepless nights getting up constantly and nursing her throughout the nights.

Not to mention, she wouldn’t sleep long when I did put her down in the bassinet.

Postpartum insomnia is real and I dealt with that heavily with my first daughter.

Until we started bedsharing.

I started bedsharing with her when she was around 2 weeks old and I felt like I finally cracked to our sleeping troubles.

The only reason I started was that I noticed she stayed asleep a lot longer whenever she was near me and that it was much easier to breastfeed her in the bed.

My husband and I were also finally getting some sleep as well without having to constantly get up and worry about the baby.

Since I did make the decision to bedshare with my baby, I started to research how to bedshare safely with a newborn so I could apply what I have learned.

I ended up bedsharing with my first daughter for 6 months and have been currently bedsharing with my 3-month-old since we brought her home from the hospital.

And it has been going really well and we are all getting that much-needed rest.

I have been using the same tactics that I learned with my first baby with my second baby and I want to share my insight here.

Here are some safe ways to bedshare with a newborn.

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When You Should Not Bedshare With A Newborn

Before I discuss how I safely bedshare with my 3-month-old, let’s discuss when you should not bedshare with a newborn.

It’s really important that as parents that we know when bedsharing can be dangerous.

There are many benefits to bedsharing but if you are not practicing it safely then you are putting your baby at risk and I know that you do not want that.

According to The Lullaby Trust, these are the circumstances in which you should not be bedsharing with your baby:

• If either you or your partner smokes (even if you do not smoke in the bedroom)
• If either you or your partner has drunk alcohol or taken drugs (including medications that may make you drowsy)
• Your baby was born premature (before 37 weeks)
• Your baby was born at a low weight (2.5kg or 5½ lbs or less)
• You should never sleep on a sofa or armchair with your baby (this can increase the risk of SIDS by 50 times)

These are the times that you should never ever bedshare with your baby so make sure you are aware of these instances so you can continue to keep your baby safe.

Like I was saying above, there are many benefits to bedsharing with your baby such as the secure attachment that you are creating with your baby that makes them feel safe and cared for.

The writers from Belly Belly also noted these other benefits that bedsharing with a baby can provide:

• Babies naturally leanrning their days from their nights
• Helps babies practive rousing themselves
• Mom is able to meet the needs of the baby without having to get up
• Less nighttime crying because baby is close
• Helps maintain an adequete milk supply for breastfeeding moms
• Mom is able to get a better rest

So as you can see, I pretty much said that the same things above because bedsharing really does all of these things for me.

I’m not here to convince anyone to bedshare with your baby.

But if you are curious about bedsharing and want to hear how to safely bedshare with a newborn from a mom who has done it twice now, then check out those tips below.

Safe Ways To Bedshare With A Newborn

Now that you know that you are good to bedshare with your baby, let’s discuss what I do to do it safely.

Discuss Bedsharing With Your Partner

Before you make the decision to bedshare with your baby, you need to make sure that your partner and you are on the same page with bedsharing.

If your partner is not on board with it, then you need to figure out a different approach.

If they don’t want to have the baby in the bed but are ok with having the baby in the room, then you can create a nursery nook in your bedroom for your baby to sleep in.

Room-sharing has just as many benefits and is often encouraged for parents to do with their babies for the first year.

We actually have a nursery nook set up in our bedroom that our baby girl starts off in before we move her to our bed when she wakes up for the first feed of the night.

Another option, if you are both ok with it, is to have your partner temporarily sleep somewhere else in the home until you are more comfortable placing the baby in the crib.

It is whatever works for you both, but it needs to work for you both.

Have A Firm Mattress

Once you have established that you are bedsharing with your baby, you need to make sure your mattress is firm and doesn’t leave an indention in it when you have been laying in it.

As comfortable as the memory foam mattresses are, they are not made for little babies who do not have the proper head and limb control.

Ditch the memory mattress and have something more firm for your baby to lay on while in the bed.

Keep Mattress Mostly Clear Of Pillows and Blankets

We have a king-size bed which means that we have king-size pillows and a big comforter on our bed.

Just like if you were to place a baby in the crib, you want it to be mostly clear of blankets, pillows, and anything that could cover their face.

At night, my husband and I both sleep on one pillow and pull back the comforter so the only sheet that we have over us is just the thin flat sheet.

Ideally, you don’t want any blankets, but we do get cold at night so by having that thinner blanket we are able to still stay warm.

Place Baby In The Middle Of Bed

When my husband and I are sleeping with our baby girl, she is always placed in the middle between us, mostly on my side where she can nurse easily.

It is the safest place for her to be in the bed and we don’t have to worry about her accidentally rolling off of the bed.

If my husband is not in the bed, then I place a pillow on the edge of the bed where he normally sleeps and one on the ground as well.

We do have a king-size bed and the chances of a newborn rolling all the way to the other end of the bed are very slim but we would much rather be safe than sorry.

Babies are growing and developing daily so you need to be prepared for anything.

Ditch The Swaddle

During the day, I would try to swaddle my baby, but I do not at night when we are sleeping.

Once again, a baby doesn’t have proper head or limb control and then us swaddling is really cutting off their ability to move.

I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if my baby rolled over while still swaddled in the bed.

So save the swaddling for those shorter daytime naps and just dress your little one in some footed pajamas that will keep them warm.

I like these 2 Way Zipper Footed Pajamas from Carter’s.

Place Baby On Their Back To Sleep

When you are breastfeeding your little one in the bed, you will be tummy to tummy so they will be on their side nursing from you.

However once they are done, you can roll them from their side to their back and this will be relatively easy to do since you don’t have to move them.

Your baby may start naturally doing this after a while once they have gotten used to sleeping on their back.

My daughter definitely has and this has also lead to her being able to sleep on her back during her daytime naps as well.

Offer Them A Pacifier At Night

And the last safe way to bedshare with a newborn is to offer them a pacifier at night.

If you all read my post on weaning my toddler from her pacifier, then you might be cringing at this tip.

But if you did read that post, then you know that pacifiers are not all bad and can serve a purpose for your little ones.

In the case of bedsharing, pacifiers keep your baby in a lighter state of sleep because it induces your baby to periodically suck on it.

This reduces the chance that your baby will stop breathing.

I keep the pacifier in the bed with us and offer it to my baby once she has finished nursing.

Make sure that breastfeeding is well established before offering your little one a pacifier and that can usually take a few days to make sure your baby is latching correctly.

Your Turn

Well, there you have it. Those are all of the safe ways I bedshare with my newborn. Now, I want to hear from you all now. Do you all co-sleep with your babies? If so, what are some safe ways that you cosleep with your babies? Let me know in the comments and while you are still here, check out my previous post below.

• Read More: Helpful Potty Training Tips For Girls

Love,

Just Jass