Embracing Being A Girl Dad From A Girl Dad

Embracing being a girl dad was something that came naturally to my husband.

This is really surprising considering that he wanted a boy both times I have been pregnant.

To be completely honest, we both wanted boys both times I have been pregnant.

When we found out both times that we were having girls, my husband actually took it really well and embraced that we were having healthy baby girls.

I was actually the one that suffered from some minor gender disappointment.

I know that my husband wants a son as I do one day but it just hasn’t been in the cards for us.

But he understands that at this current moment, he needs to be the dad that our girls need.

And he has been doing a great job being a girl dad so far.

At this time, our girls are 3 years old and 11 months old, so my husband is a girl dad to a toddler and a baby.

He is obviously in the early stages of their life and has a lot more to look forward to in the school-age, preteen, and teenage years.

But he is ready and willing to continue being the dad that they will need as they encounter the different stages of their childhood.

I decided to ask my hubby what it means to be a girl dad and how he has been embracing this role in his life.

And I want to share his thoughts for those dads who are expecting a girl and would like some perspective on what it means to be a girl dad.

If you are interested in hearing how my husband has been embracing being a girl dad, then just keep reading.

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Why It’s Important That Dads Are Present In Their Daughter’s Life

Before I dive into some thoughts on what it means to be a girl dad, let’s talk about this.

How important is it that dads are present in their daughter’s life?

There is only one right answer to this question.

It is very important.

Growing up, it was my dad, my mom, my younger sister, and me, so my dad is also a girl dad.

My dad was tough on us, but he is still really kind, caring, and understanding towards us.

We both really looked up to him because he meant what he said and did what he said he was going to do.

He cared for and loved his family deeply and would do anything to make sure we were well taken care of and safe.

It is not that my mom isn’t caring or loving, because she very much is and I love her just as much.

But my relationship with my dad is just different.

My mom and I can relate to all the girly and womanly things that we as women can discuss and talk about.

But since my dad is a man, I am able to get his perspective and see for myself how men treat women that they care for.

Dr. Tartt talks about how important the relationship between a father and a daughter is in his article here.

He even goes on to say that in a lot of cases where the father is absent or cold/detached from their daughters, the daughters were likely to experience depression and insecurities in themselves.

And many of these little girls will grow up and take these same insecurities and depressive traits into their own relationships.

Or even think it is ok for a man to be cold and dismissive towards them.

Other studies have shown that weak father-daughter relationships can also cause:

• Lower self-esteem
• Engagement in sexual behavior early
• Use of alcohol and drugs early

These are all things that can happen if a strong relationship between a father and a daughter is not established.

If my dad wasn’t present when I was a little girl, I might have fallen into that same predicament.

Some women still do even with their fathers are present and active.

But my dad’s presence in itself showed me what being a man meant through his actions and his treatment of the people closest to him.

Whether it is being a loving and loyal husband to his wife or a caring and present father to his children.

He is exactly the type of man that I would want to marry one day and I feel like I got pretty close with my husband.

Now my husband has the same opportunity to develop that special bond and connection with our girls.

With that being said, let’s get into how he has been embracing being a girl dad.

Embracing Being A Girl Dad From A Girl Dad

Girls Are Different From Boys

The very first thing that my husband had to do when embracing being a girl dad is accept that girls are different from boys.

My husband comes from a larger family where there are more boys than girls.

So quite naturally he is used to more masculine energy since he grew up with mostly brothers.

Growing up for him, it was all about dirt, cars, collectible cards, action figures, and sports.

Typical boy things.

Well, as our first daughter is getting older, it has become much clearer what she enjoys doing and playing with.

And she can be a bit of a girly girl at times.

My oldest daughter loves wearing dresses, putting bows in her hair, playing with baby dolls, and even pretending to put make-up on.

All things that my husband has no clue about.

But he adapted and learned to lean into some of the things that she enjoys.

Even if playing with baby dolls isn’t his thing.

Girls Can Get Dirty Too

The next thing that my husband realized with girls is that girls can get dirty too.

What I mean by that is that girls can do “boy” things too such as roughhousing, playing in the dirt, and playing sports too.

It is not that these things are strict “boy” things but society often labels them as such so men may be hesitant to engage in these types of things with their daughters.

I mentioned above that my older daughter can be a bit of a girly-girl.

Well, she also loves wrestling, playing in the dirt, throwing footballs, playing soccer, and even pretending she is a superhero.

All things that my husband gets down with.

There is this perception that if a dad has a daughter, he won’t be able to find a way to relate to her.

But if fathers took the time to bond with their daughters, they may learn that they like some of the same things.

My husband has learned that his daughter already shares some of his interests which only further deepens their bond.

Dad’s Attention Matters

Once again, it is not that mom’s attention doesn’t matter.

It is just dad’s attention is just different.

I know in my personal experience growing up, it was something about making my dad proud.

My mom was always proud of me and knew that I was doing my best at whatever I was doing.

But my dad always gave me that extra push to go further and outside of my comfort zone to excel even more.

And when I did, it would make him so proud to see me succeed and thrive.

Which in turn made me feel confident and proud of myself.

I already see how much my daughter’s face lights up when she shows her dad something she made or tells him something that did.

She is looking for his reaction and wants to know what he will do once she shows him.

It starts young, so dad’s reaction matters.

Tone Is Everything

A major difference that my husband is learning about being a girl dad is that tone is everything.

In a previous post, I discuss how I try to discipline my daughter without yelling or hitting her.

I admit that this is hard to do all the time because this is a tough stage that we are currently in with our 3-year-old.

She is much more independent and vocal at this stage and likes to express her wants and desires.

With that expression also comes her dislikes and displeasures.

When she is having a moment and I have to be assertive with her, she has figured out that there is a difference between mom and dad when it comes to discipline.

Even though I’m expressing myself firmly and assertively to her, it affects her differently when it is her dad using that tone with her.

It is as if it hurts her feelings more when her father gets onto her.

When my husband is being assertive with our daughter, his voice is much deeper which may scare our daughter.

And she is not very receptive to this approach.

He has learned if he does catch himself doing this, he will actually come back around and apologize and say what he wants to say without yelling.

She is much more receptive when you are on her level and talking to her in a calmer fashion.

Girls Really Love Their Dads

And the last thing my husband has embraced being a girl dad is that little girls love their dad.

And not just a little bit.

But a whole lot.

When my oldest daughter was a newborn, she was really only aware of just me.

I was breastfeeding her so I was essentially the woman that feed her and put her to sleep.

But as she got older and became more aware of her surroundings, she quickly learned about the other individual in her life.

Her dad.

And the moment that it clicked that dad is much more fun to be around, they became two peas in a pod.

Our youngest daughter is starting to follow the same path so it is looking more and more likely, that we will have 2 daddy’s girls on our hands.

Girls love hard and my husband is getting a full dose of this type of love from having girls.

Your Turn

Well, that is how my husband has been embracing being a girl dad. I want to hear from you all now. For my fellow girl parents, how have your husbands been embracing being a girl dad? Let me know in the comments and while you are still here, check out my previous post below. Until next time!

• Read More: Reconnecting With My Husband After Having A Baby

Love,

Just Jass