What To Expect When Becoming A Mom For The First Time

Whether you cried in joy or fear from seeing that big fat positive on that pregnancy test, nothing can really prepare you for becoming a mom for the first time.

All of those articles and blog posts that I read on “How To Be A Good Mom To A Newborn” and “Things To Know As A First-Time Mom.

And all of that did nothing when I actually became a mom for the first time.

I became a mom in 2018 when my daughter was born and it completely turned my life around in a number of ways.

These changes consisted of me transitioning from working to becoming a stay-at-home mom, breastfeeding, and getting a new title that I had to become familiar with quickly.

It is crazy when you think about it. You literally become a mom overnight.

With this new transition, things can get overwhelming pretty quickly. And it should be because this is a big deal.

It can be scary and overwhelming when you become a mom and I want to normalize those anxious feelings you may be feeling.

This is what you can expect when becoming a mom for the first time.

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Can You Really Prepare To Be A Mom For The First Time?

Even though I just mentioned that it feels useless trying to prepare for becoming a mom, you should definitely at least try to prepare yourself for becoming a mom.

And plus I feel like I would be providing you all a disservice if I didn’t at least offer something on how to do just that.

Because let’s face it, when we are all encountering something new, it’s better to be prepared somewhat than to not be prepared at all.

So can you really prepare to be a first-time mom?

The main tip I want to offer is taking those classes that your OB is recommending and offered at the hospital where you are delivering.

You can read all the books in the world, but nothing quite does the trick than hands-on learning.

I took a breastfeeding class at the hospital because I knew that I would be breastfeeding for the first time and wanted to know what to expect.

And I’m so glad that I did.

I felt way more prepared when I was trying to get my daughter to latch for the first time and was able to consult with a lactation specialist to guide me through those days in the hospital.

Bright Horizons also provides these tips that can help you feel more emotionally prepared as a first-time mom:

• Make A Plan
• Cut Yourself Some Slack
• Take Care Of Yourself While You Are Pregnant
• Manage Relationship Stress
• Use Your Support Network

When it all comes down to it, becoming a mom for the first time is scary and the best way to truly prepare is by just trying to relax.

Now, let’s get into what I experienced when I became a first-time mom.

Becoming A Mom For The First Time

There is a range of emotions you experience as a first-time mom, but I’m going to break down the 3 big emotions that happened to me within my first year of motherhood that will likely happen to you too.

You will cry

Yea, you read that right. You will cry.

Bring on the ugly, your favorite character in a show died, crying.

You are already sleep-deprived and something as simple as just wanting to drink a cup of coffee without being interrupted can trigger a meltdown.

Babies are tough.

When you think about it, you carry this tiny human around for 9 months providing everything he/she needs by virtually doing nothing.

Then when they come out, they are needing your complete attention and you as their provider, are responsible for them.

Talk about pressure.

I have a confession that I would like to make.

I cried in my closet at least once every couple of weeks during the first 6 months of my daughter’s life.

There are still moments when I need to cry every once in a while now.

Not because she was a hard baby. She was great.

I cried from the overwhelming emotions and pressure I felt as a first-time mom with a newborn.

My life literally revolved around 3-hour cycles of feeding, popping, and sleeping and I found myself struggling with postpartum depression.

Read More: My Truth About Postpartum Depression As A First Time Mom

You have to find a way to relieve some of those emotions and I did so through tears.

You and Your Partner Will Butt Heads

Now, this is likely to happen to even those couples who “never” argue.

This doesn’t mean that it is time to call it quits.

It is just an adjustment period.

When you are in a new place, you have to adapt to that new place.

This is that new place.

The true meaning of partnership will show up in this stage and don’t be surprised if you don’t like what your partner is doing.

Your partner may change the diaper too slowly.

They may be hesitant to take on tasks such as bathing a newborn or even changing their clothes.

And the worse one is when the baby wakes up crying at 3 in the morning and your partner remains asleep as if there isn’t a baby crying through the baby monitor.

Is anybody else ready to snatch their significant other up and shake them?

I definitely was.

I love my fiancé very much and want to spend the rest of my life with him, but he became the target of my overwhelmed and burnout emotions some days.

He did the absolute best he could and was available to help with whatever I needed.

He just isn’t mommy and the baby knows that too.

I suggest cutting your partner some slack.

Especially the ones who are trying to help.

I can’t speak to the partners who are absent or don’t want to be a part of the child’s life.

For mothers who are in that position, I truly feel for you.

I can’t imagine losing my partner or not having a partner present at all.

You Will Thrive

And after everything I said above, you will thrive.

All those tears will dry up and you will find yourself smiling down at your little one wondering how have I gone this long without you in my life.

After getting on to your partner for the 100th time about the way they change the diaper, you will lean into them and thank them for changing the baby’s diaper.

Because that little break was exactly what you needed.

Yes, a baby is hard, but it is so worth it.

Being a new mom is tough, but as you will learn.

You will learn that you are already equipped for this.

Make sure to engage in some much-needed self-care on the days that it gets really overwhelming.

We can’t show up for our baby if we aren’t showing up for ourselves.

Your Turn

Now, that I have discussed my experience of becoming a mom for the first time, I want to hear from you all. What was your experience as a first-time mom? I would love to hear your experience in the comments below and while you are still here, check out my previous post below. Until next time!

• Read More: Confronting Your Fears As An Introvert

Love,

Just Jass