What To Expect Extended Breastfeeding A 21 Month Old Toddler

I can honestly say that I didn’t realize that I would still be breastfeeding my daughter who is now 21 months old.

But here we are.

When I started this breastfeeding journey for a second time, I didn’t have an end goal in mind.

My first daughter weaned herself by 18 months, so I naturally figured that my second daughter would probably wean herself around a year and a half as well.

Boy, I was wrong.

Not only am I still breastfeeding, but I still don’t see an end in sight.

My daughter turns 2 in a few months and there is a chance that she can still be breastfeeding by then.

I planned to follow her lead and let her wean herself at her own pace.

And I’m still currently doing that.

In my mind, I knew that if I was going to follow her lead that there is a chance that I could be breastfeeding for two years.

Which is something that I’m ok with

But at the same time, I would love her to be completely done by 2.

There are so many benefits to extended breastfeeding a toddler that I will share below.

But breastfeeding a toddler is also much more different than breastfeeding a baby.

Which is exactly what I will be talking about in this post.

Here I will be sharing my reality and experience with extended breastfeeding my 21-month-old toddler.

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How Long Is Too Long To Breastfeed?

Before I dive into what to expect with extended breastfeeding a toddler, let’s talk about this.

How long is too long to be breastfeeding?

Because I’m sure that everyone has an opinion on what is too long.

Some will say that it’s time to call it quits when they start getting teeth which can be as early as 6 months.

Others will say once they turn 1, it is time to start the weaning process.

And lastly, there are individuals like myself who feel that after 2 years of nursing, it’s finally time to end this journey.

There is no right answer to this question.

Because that decision is ultimately up to you.

There are people who only nurse for the first few months because either their supply can’t keep up or because breastfeeding was taking a toll on them physically and mentally.

• Read More: Boosting My Milk Supply As A Breastfeeding Mom

Which I completely get.

And then there are people like me who are in it for the long haul.

My long haul is the 2-year mark.

While others may be ok with nursing past 2 years and may even go 3 years.

To even have the ability to breastfeed your child for however long is a blessing in itself.

There are so many benefits to breastfeeding that I talked about in my post on some of my must-haves while breastfeeding.

• Read More: Breastfeeding Essentials For Second-Time Moms

And you will still reap those benefits as you continue to breastfeed past the age of 1.

According to What To Expect, some of the benefits of extended breastfeeding include:

• Nutritional boost
• Protection from illness
• Future health benefits such as lower blood pressure and cholesterol
• Boosted brain development
• Comfort

And your little one isn’t the only one that is benefiting from extended breastfeeding.

For us mamas, it reduces our chance to develop breast or ovarian cancer and since our bodies are still producing milk, it’s burning calories which allows us to maintain a healthy weight.

Now that we have an idea of how long is too long to nurse your child, let’s get into what it is like extended breastfeeding my 21-month-old daughter.

What To Expect Extended Breastfeeding A 21-Month-Old Toddler

Breastfeeding Past 1 Is Normal

The first point I want to make regarding breastfeeding my 21-month-old toddler is that it is normal to breastfeed past 1.

If a child has been nursing since they were born, what makes you think that they will suddenly be done when they turn 1?

Just like I mentioned above, many women feel that when their child turns 1, they should be done nursing so they begin the weaning process.

But the reality is that most children who have been nursing since they were born are not just going to suddenly stop nursing when they turn 1.

Which is very normal.

I completely get that some moms are mentally and physically drained from nursing and weaning would be a better option for their over well-being.

And I agree that you should if that is the case.

But if you are getting pressured into ending your breastfeeding journey when they turn 1 because of societal and outside influences, then that is not a good enough reason.

This is your child and if you and your child are good with continuing your journey after one, then do so.

Don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.

You May Receive Strange/Judgemental Looks From Others

To piggyback off what I was saying above, something else to expect with extended breastfeeding a 21-month-old is the strange looks you may receive when nursing in public.

Because that still happens even into toddlerhood.

Most people don’t really bat an eye if you are nursing a small baby in public.

But let it be a walking and talking toddler with a mouth full of teeth, then it becomes the strangest thing that someone has ever seen.

In many other countries around the world, it is not uncommon to see a 1, 2, or even 3-year-old still nursing.

It is normalized there.

But for some strange reason, it is not normalized here in the US, so there is a big chance that you may be looked at as weird or strange for continuing to nurse your toddler.

I feel like that narrative is starting to change though as more and more moms are coming out and sharing their breastfeeding journeys that extend past one.

This is exactly why I’m sharing this journey here as well.

As I said above, it is normal to breastfeed past 1, but not everyone around you may agree.

Sometimes They Nurse A Lot/Sometimes They Nurse A Little

The next thing to expect with extended breastfeeding a toddler is the frequency of their nursing.

Which can either be a lot sometimes.

Or a little other times.

That is just how toddlers roll.

I will say that most are not nursing as much as they did when they were younger because they are also eating solids and regular food.

For instance, my daughter nurses anywhere between 4 to 7 times a day

She will nurse when she wakes up in the morning, before and after her afternoon nap, and before bed.

If she is nursing anymore outside of those times above, then I know she is either experiencing a growth spurt or is nursing for comfort.

This is why I say the nursing frequency fluctuates.

They may be getting the nutrients from the breastmilk, but they also get the comfort that you provide when they are in your arms.

They May Still Nurse A Night

While on the topic of frequency, something else that may be happening is that they might still be nursing at night.

If you all caught my post on how I have been transitioning my toddler to her bed from cosleeping, then you would know that my daughter still wakes up to nurse at night.

She doesn’t sleep through the night and wakes to nurse at least once every night.

So if you are in the same boat, you are not alone.

I know so many blogs and websites say that they should be night weaned before 1, but if your toddler is anything like mine, then that is much easier said than done.

We have been trying to night wean her to no avail and that is just where we are right now.

Nursing Positions Become Interesting

If you are currently breastfeeding a toddler, then you have probably already experienced how interesting the nursing positions can get.

The moment your child becomes mobile, they never go back to just being still.

And that also applies to when they are nursing.

Long gone are the days when you can cradle and cuddle your baby in your arms while they nursing.

Here comes the toddler who runs over to tell you that they want to nurse and might even lift your shirt and pull out your breast to do it themselves.

That could just be my daughter.

But I’m sure other breastfeeding mamas can relate.

Not only is she lifting my shirt to nurse, but she changes positions often while nursing.

Sometimes, she likes being cradled in my arms.

Other times, she is nursing while halfway hanging off of me because she is trying to also get down.

And lastly, she turns into an acrobat at times while nursing because she is constantly tossing and turning around in all directions.

This is what can be like nursing a toddler so if you are in it for the long haul, expect some interesting nursing positions.

Balancing Nursing With Solids

One of the biggest differences between nursing a younger baby and nursing a toddler is the introduction of solids.

Smaller babies get the majority of their nutrition from breast milk.

Well, once your baby turns one, they are still getting those nutrients from breastmilk, but they also get their nutrients from the food that they are eating as well.

By the age of one, you have probably already introduced baby food to your little one.

And probably even regular table food as well.

By the time my daughter was one, she was eating table food and baby food and now at 21 months, she eats 3 meals a day of just table food while.

It can get tricky balancing nursing and solids because sometimes your child may prefer nursing over eating food.

But it is needed.

During the weaning process with my older daughter, what gradually happened was that the nursing sessions were replaced with water, meals, and snacks.

This is exactly what is happening with my younger daughter as well.

As you continue your breastfeeding journey with your toddler, make sure you continue to offer meals and snacks in between.

You Can Both Enjoy & Be Annoyed With Breastfeeding A Toddler

And my last thought on extended breastfeeding my 21-month-old toddler is that you can both enjoy and be annoyed with breastfeeding a toddler.

Do I enjoy breastfeeding my toddler?

Yes.

Do I sometimes get annoyed with doing it?

Also yes.

I think some people get it confused if a mom shows any hints of frustration or vents about breastfeeding her child that they shouldn’t be doing it.

And that is not always the case.

I can’t speak for every breastfeeding mama out there but for myself, I find breastfeeding to be rewarding and it was something that I was looking forward to doing again with my second child.

And even as rewarding as it feels to me, it can also feel really annoying and even constricting at times.

But just because I feel that way now and then, it doesn’t mean that this journey is less enjoyable.

Is nursing a toddler a lot more different than nursing a baby?

Absolutely.

But I decided to continue into toddlerhood and it is a decision that I’m ok with.

If you were needing a sign or some sort of affirmation that you can both enjoy and find breastfeeding a toddler annoying then here you go.

Your Turn

Well, that is my reality of what it is like extended breastfeeding my 21-month-old. I want to hear from you all now. For those that are currently extended breastfeeding their toddlers, did I nail it? What are some tips or advice that you would offer to moms who are considering extended breastfeeding? Let me know in the comments and while you are still here, check out my previous post below. Until next time!

• Read More: Preschool Learning Activities For 4-Year-Olds

Love,

Just Jass